It wasn't me officer, I swear

Among the other 4,635 ridiculous things we have to do to pass the home study is get a record of the 9.11 calls from each of our residences for the past 5 years. (Just a little aside - it's not that I'm mad that we have to go through this drawn out vetting process, it's that I'm mad that EVERYONE doesn't have to go through it. I mean, you have to have a license to drive a car, and be 21 to drink alcohol, but you can just make babies all willy nilly?)

So, 9.11 call records. Sounds simple. Unless your partner, prior to moving in with you, lived on campus. At a university. Full of 18ish to 22ish year old children who don't always make the best choices. She was a professional RA, so to speak. So she was there. For each of the shootings. The drug over doses. The alcohol poisonings. And the general debauchery.

I guess our homestudy will have an entire chapter devoted to explaining that away.