Thursday, May 19, 2011

Home Study Part I

S and I spent all of last week anxiously awaiting our first meeting with our social worker - the one in which we are interviewed separately. I was convinced she was going to run it like Sudden-Death-Newly-Wed-Game. I thought her main goal was to trip us up and end the meeting with a gruff, "No Baby for You!" So not the case.

First of all, I don't even know how this lady made it to the appointment. She was sort of rambly and discombobulated. She couldn't focus and kept calling S the wrong name. I don't see how she's been "doing this for years". I don't even see how she makes it out the door in the morning!

The hardest part (for me) was explaining my mother (who has borderline personality disorder) without sounding like a total freak from a family that runs rampant with mental illness. I'm not exactly sure what impression she was left with. Out of our 4 collective parents, S and I are on talking terms with only 1 of them. For various reasons. Which is kind of a bummer when you're trying to convince people that your loving family can't wait to welcome a little peanut.

The majority of her questions were about timelines, when I graduated from college, when I started my first job, when I moved to what state. Kind of boring stuff. She asked us what time we usually go to bed (really?). And about our infertility treatments (which surprisingly made me very defensive):
DitzypantsSocialWorker: So you can't have kids?
DefensiveMe: YES WE CAN. We just chose not to. At this time. So there.
And then it was over. Next Thursday she comes to our house for our last meeting. According to Ditzypants, she will be there to see if our place is reasonably clean, if we have a gate around our pool (we don't have a pool), and if there are any holes in the floors or walls (again, really?).

Here's to hoping this latest hurdle goes smoothly. And that the process for obtaining the final home study approval doesn't take another SIX WEEKS like she indicated.


  1. How disgustingly insensitive of her.

  2. ugh - how frustrating! Make sure to get the gate around you pool - lol! I love your name for her - it sounds perfect!!!

  3. i know i should be outraged, but the way you write about her makes me giggle. what a nutcase!

  4. I am preparing for our social worker visit and sadly, this made me feel better. Hope it all goes smoothly.

    Hey--did ditzypants call your friends/family members for references? What kinds of questions did they ask. My brother wants talking points.